Archive for Journeys

Don’t Give Up – #MentalHealthAwarenessWeek 2017: Blog #1

Posted in Non-fiction, Uncategorized with tags , , on May 8, 2017 by becciseaborne


Ironically, the point at which you feel like utter shit, when you most want to give up, is the point at which you should be most proud and defiant. When it feels that bad, it’s not because you’re a failure, as you believe, but because you’re working your very hardest despite all the obstacles. It is precisely the time not to give up, because you’re just about to win this particular battle. 

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Unperson

Posted in Poetry with tags , , on January 9, 2017 by becciseaborne

 
.

Take me away from the world

And feed me love

Let me bathe in understanding

And drink down a sense of myself

Pour into me a joy for my own soul

And a peace with my battered heart

.

Take me to a place where

I can breathe in equanimity

And exhale the churning tide within

Let me walk in self-kindness

Give to me the self I am

And let me celebrate her

.

I want to swim in a sense of purpose

And dive straight for the tiller of me

Make my own wake

Show me how to float on self-esteem

Become the buoyancy surrounding me

.

I want to learn my shape, to feel the space I occupy

Push back against my flesh…just enough

Help me find the right consistency of air

To know and be known

To meet its pressure, just so, just there

.

Or else let me settle 

Here in still, silent numbness

To watch the stars go out

 

Hinterlonging

Posted in Poetry with tags , , , on December 7, 2016 by becciseaborne

lavander

 

Standing in sun-dusted fields of lavender

Soul scorched by umbilical tears

Wind-thrown hair whipping primal salt

To bring the wounds again

 

Heart beats convict’s rhythm

Locking you within me

Spectre’s twin of my own self

Tangle-twisting our entities

 

Absorbing a wonder I long to witness

From by your side

I glimpse a shadow of us walking together

In the distant hinterland

 

Transcendent beauty perpetually provokes

This bittersweet ghost

Your eyes rooting me to this Earth

And everything beyond

 

So far from home, yet there she is still

Unwanted heart tracing your beat

Emotion’s futile friction

Drags scalding heat through my veins

 

Gratitude for finding you wages war

With bitterness for losing you

In these ripe fields with eternal tears

And transformative light

Losing a Ghost

Posted in Poetry with tags , , , on October 22, 2016 by becciseaborne

vanishing-point-united-visual-artists

Nothing has changed…

Still I wake coldly alone

Visit friends on my own

Sign cards from me only

 

Nothing has changed…

Still I cook for one

Share my space with no other

Discuss my bad day with thin air

 

Nothing has changed…

So why has everything changed?

Why is everything empty?

My phone newly redundant?

 

Why is my day so thin?

My world so bare?

My life so diminished?

The man who wasn’t there…

 

Image: Vanishing Point by United Visual Artists

https://uva.co.uk/work/vanishing-point

 

 

Tend to Me?

Posted in Poetry with tags , , on July 14, 2016 by becciseaborne
>·<
I spent today
Pulling out all the weeds
And dead things from my garden
It looks terribly bare
I’ve left it untended for too long
>·<
I’m uncertain how to fill
These hungry spaces
Perhaps the tiny, struggling
Remains of previous endeavours
Will grow again
>·<
I haven’t the heart
For putting in the work, though…
New beauty please
Empty
But tidy?
>·<

The Choice

Posted in Poetry, Uncategorized with tags , , , , on July 6, 2016 by becciseaborne

heart

.
I’ve had a falling out with my heart
She brought me to a dangerous yet beautiful place
I came willingly, open-eyed
But now I need to return, I find she won’t allow it
.
We are stuck here
.
So my choice is to stay with her, and the pain
Or to leave without her
She is wayward and wild, my heart
Stubborn and cruel to me
.
Yet she is wise and true
.
I’ve always trusted her
Wherever she takes me
She’s taken me to joy, pain and grief
To beauty,darkness and love
.
Never to peace, though
.
She has never taken me to peace
Perhaps it is time for peace
Perhaps we should part ways now
My heart
.
And me

Strange Skies

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , on July 4, 2016 by becciseaborne

Stormy Skies by Marcus Sam

Things get lost
Picked up
Put down

Warm Streets
Cold homes
Strange skies

People get lost
Unseen
Yet changed

Warm Streets
Cold homes
Strange skies

Hearts get lost
Reckless
Broken

Warm skies
Cold streets
Strange homes